Kamakhya Bhairava Upasaka Foundation

This is not a testimonial. Nor is it experience of my sadhana. It is a honest heartfelt account of how Sri Rajarshi Nandy ji and Kamakhya Bhairava Upasaka Foundation - KBUF as we fondly call it, have touched my life. To me they are not different, both Sir and KBUF are irrevocably one, for KBUF does not exist without him. For a skeptic like me, that questioned ritual practices, having observed people from my family and circle perform rituals each day rendered meaningless due to lack of ‘heart’ in them, that seemed meaningless and empty to me. But after meeting Sir and being a part of Kamakhya Bhairava Kula , there has been a 360 degree difference in my life. Struggling with health issues , grief I was at life’s lowest ebb. Sir’s guidance and kripa has turned my life’s trajectory. Though my faith in devatas never dwindled over the years, since childhood, various sadhanas that I undertook imparted a new perspective to my life. I wondered if the life I lived before the advent of Sir in my life was living or merely existing?. It is my purva janma sukarma that I have been blessed by a Guru of his calibre. Ever so kind and generous, there has never been any pressure , monetary, dharmic or spiritual during my association with him. I won’t go into how long that has been but it has been quite long years.. I only wish I had met him sooner, started my sadhana journey towards my Ishta earlier and to this day I keep going back to what he said to me once . “How do you know that you have experienced what you have in this span of time that you would have had you started since your birth?”. Since then I firmly believe that what is meant for one atleast spiritually will come to them through sadhanas in the current life , starting from where they left off in the previous one. His immense practical wisdom stemming from his own beautiful experiences with the devatas that have blessed him abundantly , pour out of his words, golden nuggets to be treasured . All that is asked in KBUF is be true to your spiritual mentor and choosing one alone , initially atleast makes it easier to follow the path without any juggling and clash of spiritual practices so you are forced to acknowledge one in the end . That too possibly after trials and tribulations, unnecessary delays and hurdles in one’s path. The pilgrimages that I have been fortunate to have accompanied him to, have added a different dimension to the experiencing a Kshetra , that will remain etched into my memory and heart. One such to Tarapith totally obliterated my life , leaving me with an unquenchable thirst for Ma Tara, songs and poetry in Her praise and Her presence, augmented by Her 16 Thursday Sadhana, that I keep doing in a loop, She makes me. I have derived unasked for material benefits from the blissful Sadhana, that I do solely for Ma Tara Preeti. A similar experience was of Kashi Kshetra , I used to hanker for a darshan from the garba griha and Sir showed me the bliss of being lost in Baba KalaBhairava, sitting outside in His contemplation. The beauty and honesty is that he lives the advice and guidance he imparts , having joined him in Japa sitting in the precincts of Baba’s mandir in Kashi. I could go on… I should not forget that he has made me realise how much can be done in terms of spiritual sadhana despite battling health issues. His constant guidance and presence have made this lifetime worthwhile and believe it will continue along lifetimes. Being a true volunteer of KB Upasaka Kula, merely being a part of this unique family is of immense pride to me. May Ma and Baba continue to bless Sri Rajarshi ji with abundance , spiritually, materially for all the dharmic initiatives and endeavours that KBUF undertakes. It is a blissful and blessed journey of my life to continue to be a part of them. Sri Gurudevatabhyo Namaha Sri Guru Padakam Pujayaami Tarpayami 🙏🙏 Joy Ma Tara Joy Bhairav Baba Joy Ma Kamakhya

Rajarshi sir’s guidance and sadhana instructions have come as a blessing. I know there is a long way to go but something feels permanent now, which shall persist no matter the circumstances. Even a thousand lifetimes are not enough to express every upasaka’s gratefulness towards sir 🙏

I bow down to the devetas and My Master for making my life worth living. It's been almost 3 years , I have started Bhairava sadhana. Being an atheist to a theist the journey was a roller coaster ride. I started my sadhana by watching Rajarshi Sir's podcast, write up. Sadhana gave my life a direction. Made me strong to sail through the hardest times of life. It made me take the life as it comes. I was the one who don't know who is Bhairava, Ma Tara, Skanda.Not even knowing how to hold a mala. It changed the perspective of my life and whole me. Associated with KBUF give me an opportunity to do various seva like andanam, colective sadhana etc. Jai Ma , Jai Bhairav Baba

Namaskar. I worship Bhagwan Shiva and have been a moderately spiritual person throughout my life but I believe that the actual spiritual journey of any person starts only when a guide, a guru or a mentor enters his/her life and gives it a direction therefore my spiritual journey or any experience I’ve had is incomplete without the mention of my mentor Sh. Rajarshi Nandy ji. His appearance on you-tube and giving the magic mantra of “Om Bhairavai Namah” was not a co-incidence but a wake-up call for millions around the world including myself and that’s where it all started. His words were a magnet which not only increased my curiosity for devata upasana but my love for Bhagwan Bhairav increased manifold. My life ever since has changed slowly in subtle ways. Its been more than 3yrs now and I felt the effect of my sadhana in the first year itself but was not exactly able to judge or see what was happening inside me. But now the change I see in myself is so profound that neither me nor people around me can ignore it, I’ve become extremely calm, things that stressed me earlier have no effect on me, I’ve kind of become silent in a peaceful way. Earlier I used to control situations to get things done and in the process stress myself but now I just do the bare minimum and things just magically fall into place exactly how they should and I know there definitely is Baba’s hand in this. I feel he’s watching over me making things/life easier for me so that I can think about him even in the midst of chaos. Earlier my fav. Pastime was to learn more about how I can better myself in my work now its reading about Baba, learning Sanskrit so that I can read and understand his various stutis and sing for him even if I’m sitting in my office and even in all this I’m somehow doing exceptionally well in my work. My relationship with family/people around me has become better. There is no friction, no judging also maybe because I don’t like talking much now or trying to prove myself to anyone as I feel that in doing so, I may lose the calmness inside me and I would never lose it at any cost. I can go on and on about the inner peace I’ve found in sadhana, how Baba has protected me and pulled me out of the situations that made me uncomfortable. Initially like many maybe I expected something magical, some lights, some show…something…but now I laugh at that. How is "this" that I feel not magical, I feel free, all I want is to be with Baba and that’s the only thought that occupies me now. I don’t know what the future holds and in fact I don’t even care now as long as I’m doing my sadhana and as long as Baba is by my side. Charan Sparsh to my mentor Sh. Rajarshi Nandy ji. May his words continue to inspire many to the path of Devata Upasana, Jai Bhairav.

​With profound gratitude, I offer my shashtanga pranam to Rajarshi Nandy sir and the KBUF family. Three years ago, I was a lost soul—devoid of direction, motivation, or purpose. By divine grace, I stumbled upon sir’s podcasts, an encounter that fundamentally reshaped my existence. While I have always harbored a deep love for Lord Shiva, He often felt distant and unreachable. Discovering that Bhairav Baba is a direct manifestation of Shiva ignited a fierce determination within me to draw closer to Him. ​Commitment became my anchor. I meticulously followed every instruction, podcast insight, and disclosure shared by sir. This unwavering discipline catalyzed a profound internal shift; I evolved into a calmer, more resilient individual, accepting of life’s unpredictabilities. Today, my daily sadhana fills me with unutterable bliss, bringing tangible alignment across my materialistic, emotional, and spiritual endeavors. Engaging in KBUF’s noble initiatives, like annadanam and gouseva, has grounded me in deep humility. Furthermore, the 16 Thursdays sadhana acted as a divine intervention, alleviating my financial hardships and replacing anxiety with absolute peace. Reflecting on these three transformative years, my heart holds only one sacred prayer: across whatever lifetimes await me, may my connection to Rajarshi sir remain eternal, and may I always be guided to this path of sadhana at the very dawn of my youth. Jai Bhairav Baba! Jai Maa Tara! Jai Maa Kamakhya!

It was my lowest phase of life, in the highest state of TAMAS, where everything in life was unmoving. An extreme phase of depression where I was having thoughts of self-harm, and even tried to harm myself. I was not performing well in my exams, and there was zero progress in my life. I was living like a dead body, and being only 18 years old during that time, I was not ready to take that intensity of pain. The state of Smashana was invoked in my life, and maybe some past connection - Bhairava entered my life after invoking Smashana in my life. I have been watching Gurudev Rajarshi Nandy's videos quite often, but just for time pass. After my online class had completed, I went to use the restroom, and after coming back, A strange inner voice told me to get into BHAIRAVA SADHANA, all of a sudden, and after that moment, my mind was continuously chanting the nama mantra of Bhairava. The next day, I started my sadhana with a simple 1 mala, but I couldn't last for 2 days. I again stumbled upon the same state, feeling self-pity, depression, and an extreme case of anxiety. Bhairava didn't leave me. He, being a KIND guru, gave me some of the extreme realizations of situations, life, and with people around me, where I was forced, beaten, and pulled into Bhairava Sadhana. Guru ji told that ''Bhairava is the only deity who will pull you out from a night club and make you sit in a meditation room. '' - and yes, he brutally pulled me into the path. After that, I was consistent with the sadhana, and I had a beautiful experience quickly, and I am completely transformed now. From a weak, frail, and underconfident boy to a confident, determined, and happiest upasaka. Everything that Rajarshi Nandy sir told happened to me. I am eternally devoted to my Manasik Guru Rajarshi Nandy. (There are more things, but I didn't wanna make it too long. I have shared the overall gist) I am 20 years old now, and looking forward to continuing my Sadhana for lifetimes. Bhairava Bhairava Bhairava. Om Bhairavaya Nama. Jai Maa Kali. - Abhinav.

I started my Sadhana journey in 2023 with instructions from Rajarshi Sirs You tube video. Before that, I never had any habit of Sadhana or Upasana. I joined Sirs telegram group, and slowly started the sadhanas mentioned there. I started sadhana because I felt drawn to do it and I continued because the practice brought me a lot of calm. Overtime as my upasana continued, I felt a lot of rearrangement in my life and circumstances. This rearrangement has been a recurring theme for me . Sometimes its chaotic and stressful to handle. However, Whatever the circumstances maybe - positive or negative, the practice became my anchor. I have had so many experiences where i have felt supported, protected and guided during stressful times. I developed clarity to make decisions, Strength and confidence which I can never imagine someone like me having. There has been a lot of major changes in my work, my social circle, my priorities in life etc. Everything because of Divine Grace I have been immensely blessed and very grateful to be able to attend Rajarshi Sirs Bhairav Dharana retreat. Extremely grateful to have a Puja place to pray, be able to do the Sadhanas, to do Anushthaans, to have Kshetra darshans and blessed to be able to visit and spend time in Bhairav Baba, Maa Kamakhya and Maa Taras Kshetras. Life has become fulfilling. I love spending time in sadhana, decorating my Puja place, preparing for bhog, deciding what flowers to offer. This has brought me peace, guidance, support, protection, happiness, freedom and in many cases unbelievable miracles. Yes, I have my own share of confusions, weakness and issues, but whatever physical, mental or emotional state I am in, I feel the best after sharing it with my dieties. I feel closer and open to be able to convey all aspects of my life to my dieties. I feel lighter and supported! My overthinking and controlling nature reduced a lot. My lifestyle corrected and improved in a lot of ways. Also, I found myself equipped, protected and supported during uncertain and difficult times. Sadhana is not always joyful, sometimes its heavy, sometimes its a chore as well but it felt important to show up everyday, to have and build that connection and not by force, but by choice. This is the only area of my life where I dont feel the pressure to do anything or prove anything, that makes this even more joyful. This is a much needed practice of peace from my own nature of overdrive and ambition. Sadhana has been such an extremely personal area for me. My only goal is to always be grateful and worthy of this Great Blessing received Its like finally finding a major missing link in my life and I feel extremely grateful to Rajarshi Sir to bring this practice and to introduce Bhairav Baba, Maa Kamakhya and Maa Tara in my life 🙏

From being a complete lost soul without having a purpose in life, to serving my Guru and deities, I have found meaning to my existence. Bhairava sadhana has completely changed my life. Starting from my friends circle, to de-addicting me from many unwanted habits, to travelling to Kshetras multiple times a year. My anxiety issues are low, I don't stress about situations as much as I used to. My fears have gone down and I've had experiences that can shake one's soul. I've been able to live free, a life one can only dream of. There is a long way in my journey but I can proudly say that I'm sorted for this lifetime and the next.